Hazel The Socialist

Hazels family was rather large full of aunts uncles, cousins, grandparents and wonderful parents. Very working class, radical, left wing and republican. Family politics were unquestionably old labour party. As a child she remembers her grandfather commenting when she was looking at a picture book of the royal family "I have to feed that lot before I can buy my own children a crust of bread." He was a silversmith by trade in the suburbs of London and had been forced to leave school at the age of 12 to look after his ailing mother.

Hazel had spent many hours watching votes being counted in various elections at Brent town hall, cheering when Labour won and moaning when we lost. All Hazel’s neighbours were Jewish and she would often baby sit for Rabbi Rabinowitz. Her father would regularly don his small skull cap and go help the caretaker clean the chandeliers in the synagogue at the bottom of the road. There was no conflict between the various groups as they played happily together as children and joined in each others customs. Hazel lived in a vibrant political argumentative family. Hazel was the eldest child and was clearly loved, cared for, and encouraged but there was little mention of God, he was neither mocked or rejected but rather viewed as irrelevant.

Her God was the labour party and the T.U.C. and her Satan was the conservative party, the rich and the employers. Her hope and resurrection was the recognition of the worthiness of the working man. Hazel was quite old before she realised that conservatives could actually be nice people, in fact she eventually married one. Although Hazel was surrounded by strong opinions she was unusual in her family because she sensed there was something more to life, something mysterious, a light of truth to be searched for, known and held. She had known the Lords prayer and hymns from school assemblies and knew the stories from R.E. but these were just words, they were neither real nor personal. Even at primary school she had three huge unanswered questions.

First When she was nine years old her baby sister died and when she saw the small white coffin she thought 'Where is she' and because nobody in her family believed in God nobody could tell her, she just sensed it was not the end of her.

Secondly Hazels paternal grandmother had lost her husband in the first World War, then her son and because of this she became heavily involved in the British legion and Hazel joined her on her visits to the Royal Star and Garter homes where she saw many severely injured men. She was never shielded from the end result of war and attended many Royal British legion services at Westminster abbey where she saw many victims and although the services were just words to her, the weeping of the broken men and women caused her to think 'There must be an answer to all this suffering'.

The third was very ordinary because when she walked under a clear blue sky it made her so happy that she just wanted to shout "thank you" but who could she thank? Hazel continued wondering but could find no answers, there was no bible in the house and she would not have known to look there anyway.

On leaving school she started at teacher training college and while there she met a Christian who shared with her the good news of Jesus, that God loved her and had sent Jesus to die for her sins. Although she did not really understand fully, it opened the door a little wider. Soon after Hazel met William, she married him and moved up north, by then she was very happy and reasoned that if God loved her she should repay him by doing good works. She got involved in village and church activities and embarked on a rather pious and sanctimonious life. For many years she helped at Brownies, youth club, was secretary of the P.C.C. and organised cheese and wine parties but consequently was bored to tears. Not once did she ask if this was what God wanted, she never prayed, never read the bible and thought she was pleasing God by doing good, sacrificing herself for the good of the village, so they had better well appreciate her.

But the hollowness and emptiness inside Hazel grew and longed for something spiritual which her good works alone could not supply. Then a thought came to go to a local chapel, after much consideration she plucked up the courage to go and made the most amazing discovery, the answer to her questions and the answers was not a what but a who !!. She listened to sermons, studied the bible and was amazed that she could read the Old Testament which she had thought was merely a history of the Jews but found instead that it was very relevant to the life of Jesus. She realised that it was her sin that was getting in the way of knowing God in a personal way and that the only way to deal with sin was not by doing more good works but rather be humble instead and confess it. She learned that there was nothing she could do because God through, Jesus had already done it. She was now listening and reading with her heart and one day while peeling the potato’s she felt a strong desire to pray. "O.K. Jesus I don’t know much about you yet but I am getting to know you so I will just say Yes ! Yes! Yes ! You are my Lord and master and I want to give my life to you". The once irrelevant God was now known and had come to life

News Flash